Childfree Woman by Karin Rahbek

How to gain respect and acceptance

Do I have to be a mother?

No children by choice, chance or circumstance. We are neither villains nor victims. Women do not deserve to be treated with disdain or pity.

A childfree woman describes in an honest, strong and very personal way the thoughts and feelings associated with not having the desire to have children in the world where motherhood is seen as the most natural part of being a woman.

“What I know for sure is that this topic is not just an issue between the world and me. The weight of expectations and performance anxiety are the faithful companions of motherhood, while our childfree lifestyle evokes myths and prejudices about us as either bad feminists or selfish, shallow and self-absorbed people. However, the rules do not apply to us, because the reasons for remaining childfree are as varied as they are personal. What we really have in common is dealing with the emotions that we experience when other people don’t understand that femininity and motherhood are two separate concepts, and they do not necessarily go together”, says Karin.

Her memoir is written for those of you who do not have children, but sometimes still feel different, alone and outside when dealing with societal expectations, myths and prejudices related to the cultural norm that every woman should want to be a mother. You may also occasionally fear being lonely or regretting not having children later on.

Karin has always known that she does not want to have children. You will be able to recognize yourself in her portrait and common experiences, and the real stories will help you to deal with social situations where you do not feel as comfortable as you would like about your childfree lifestyle.

How to be a woman having no kids? This manifesto provides insight into meetings and discussions with other childfree women telling the truth about the facts of life as a not mom. Through her own experiences and thoughtful consideration, the author describes a path to separate motherhood from your female identity, and understanding that your life is not about what you are, but who you are.

Karin Rahbek has been a spokeswoman for childfree women, and is the founder of a social network and a dating site for childfree men and women searching for love or new friends. She has written the autobiography she herself had searched for in vain.


What readers say

reviews: 6
ratings: 13 (avg rating 4.15)

Do I Have To Be A Mother?: A Childfree Woman's Honest and Unspoken Thoughts and Feelings


As someone who never wanted to have children, it was great to read Karin’s book as I recognized myself all the way. I only wished it had been available to me when I was younger and felt deeply troubled by not being like everyone else. It would have given me a great sense of relief. I’m so glad it’s out there now to women who are struggling with this issue.Anja Lysholm, review on Amazon

Many times throughout the book I felt as though I was reading the secret diary of someone. It contains an important message that needs to get across to the public: Women who deselect motherhood are neither villains nor victims. They do not deserve to be treated with disdain or pity.Sara, excerpt from review on Goodreads

Great personal insight into choosing to be child free. This book was really well written and flowed well for me. As someone who has always loved kids and thought I wanted children of my own it has offered me a unique insight into choosing not to reproduce.Olivia Thomas, excerpt from review on Goodreads
Best childfree book I have read in years! A celebration to diversity and free will. It kept me turning the pages for hours on my kindle. Great topics and interesting conversations throughout the entire book! I recommend this book to everybody!Andreia Fernandes, review on Goodreads


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